Flow Like A River

We are a generation in hurry. We live as if we have to reach somewhere & we don't have enough time. The problem is not that we don't have time but that we don't know where we are heading to. We start our journey in a calmed manner but as we grow up, we build a red-light mentality. 

Red light is a wonderful idea to control traffic. It also helps you take some rest, rejuvenate, observe what is happening on the road & start your journey afresh once you get the green signal. But, if you see people at a red light, you will observe that no one wants to take a halt, breathe easy or notice what is happening around. In fact, people are more tense at a red-light; they fume over 'unnecessary' break; swear & get more stressed than they were before the break. Many of them keep the engine of the vehicle on despite the fact that they have to stay there for a certain time. They burn the fuel even when they are stationary. How funny !

Compare the same with people who have red-light mentality. They start the journey with great enthusiasm. They have their eyes on the destination & want to reach there at the earliest. The problem is that they only go through the motions & don't notice the scene around. They forget that they will reach the destination anyhow; it is the journey that they should enjoy. And when they reach their destination, they have momentary pleasure but they get stressed-out & want to take a break. But now hurried life gets the better of them & they find it hard to break the routine. How silly !

Living can be learnt best from a river flowing calmly. It is not in a hurry as it knows it will reach there someday. Not that its journey is all hunky-dory but it doesn't fight the hindrances but flows over these & these obstacles become part of it, adding to its beauty. It enjoys the journey without worrying about the destination. In fact, its only destination is 'now'; this moment & it refuses to live beyond that. How natural !

If you want to enjoy your life instead of passing it, flow like a river. Be calm in every situation. Don't hurry thinking that you have only one life. Enjoy because you have only one life. Don't struggle, don't complain. Go with the flow & enjoy this journey called life. Consider each obstacle an integral part of your life. It has come to teach you, to make you better, not to stop you. Live in 'now' as this is all that you have. How satisfying !     

Aging Differently

Aging is a natural process but aging beautifully is not natural. It requires some efforts so that we don't get old; we grow old. The difference between human beings & people can be summed up in our description of aging. While things decay, human beings grow. Then, why is it so that people don't want to age? They want to enjoy their salad days up to the maximum. They don't want wrinkles on their faces, stumble in their walk & shake in their voice. The reason for it is that they connect aging only with physical symptoms. 

Describing aging in physical terms is like comparing human beings with things. Things may wear out or rust out but humans grow old & grow wise. If we look out for some of the positive manifestation of aging, we will welcome it with open arms. In the prime of his life, a man is a bundle of energy. He wants to achieve a lot & be the best in the field that he chooses. He has a carefree attitude & tries his hands at everything. He fails many times before he tastes success. He cheats many & is duped by a large number of people. He is aggressive, industrious & a go-getter. Most of these are the positive traits & suits the persona of a young man trying to do well in life. But the problem starts when he wants to be successful by any means. His ends justify his means & he justifies the ends that he wants to meet. He starts compromising with his character, family & self. He succeeds in life & pays a heavy price for this success, but he doesn't seem to mind until he sees some grey hair on his head or a wrinkle on his face. Suddenly, he realizes that he is getting old & starts his count down.

The day he realizes that his years are numbered now, his whole mental make-up transforms. He becomes mature, satiated & sympathetic towards others. He starts looking at others with a different mindset. He doesn't want to only achieve but wants to give as well. From material possessions, he moves to nature. Not only he wants to have things but also to enjoy them. He feels blessed in many ways. He becomes spiritual, forgiving & benevolent. He loves, lives & wants to leave a legacy. This is not to deny some physical manifestation of his aging like hair-fall, a weaker body & drop in energy level. But the fact remains that old age has more to do with mind than with body. If we accept it gracefully, we will see it more as a blessing than as a curse. We will see it as arriving at a more beautiful & satisfying place, rather than seeing it as a departure stage.

If only we could learn to live our life in reverse order- starting with the grace of old age, moving to our vibrant youth & becoming a child to go back to the infinite that we came from ! 

First Class

Most of our life we try to achieve hard what others have achieved, to be what others look like & to copy what most others do. In the process we lose our own identity which by far is our most precious possession. We live in a world full of copy-cats & also-rans. But there are few who don't belong to this category. They are different in their approach & that is the reason they are different in their achievements. 

There is nothing wrong in modeling your life after someone who has been a success in some field. In fact, this is one of the secrets of a successful life. Following someone is not bad as long as we don't lose our own style. Choosing someone as a role-model is altogether a different proposition. A role model inspires you while someone you copy kills you. We start valuing the person more than we value ourselves. If we don't value self, we don't value anything that belongs to us-our time, our relationship, our uniqueness & most importantly our self-esteem. The other problem with this kind of life is that we become what others want us to be. In short, we give control of our life to others. The world is continuously trying to make us someone else & the real achievement is to resist the pressure of the external world & listen to the voice of the world inside you. Emerson said it quite succinctly when he declared, 

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

When we try to copy someone, we kill all our creative & intellectual resources. We start seeing the world from the eyes of someone else. And after a prolonged exposure to someone else's vision, we start living his life. We think & act on the commands of others. We become the genie in the lamp that has immense powers but can't do anything for himself as he is always busy pleasing others. The only original words that you hear from him is, "Your wish is my command." And when we live this kind of life we waste the most beautiful gift given by God- our life.

         "Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are."- Marilyn Monroe  

Great Teachers inspire

Human mind can work in many modes. The easiest one is telling mode & this is what majority of people do- they tell. They tell because they think they know. Asking is easy but it does not come naturally to people because asking means telling that you don''t know.  It takes guts to accept & tell that i don't know. And what to do if you know something.  Should you go & shout from the rooftops that you know? Try it; no one will listen because they won't trust you. They realize that if you have knowledge why do you need to  shout? Even if you whisper, people will come to listen to you if you are knowledgeable. Should you explain ? No need to explain because explaining means convincing them that two & two make four. You don't need to do that. Should you demonstrate? If there is a need, you should show how two & two make four every single time whatever method you employ. But the best way to teach something is by inspiring others. Because when you inspire, you become one with the person. You are the teacher & the learner both. The wall of ego melts into nothingness.  

Liberty Means Responsibility

Slavery has many shades. A man may appear free though he is enslaved by his thoughts. Most men remain in chains of negative thoughts for so long that they think it to be natural to be in chains. As Rousseau put it, 
"Slaves lose everything in their chains, even the desire of escaping from them." 
Another reason that people live in chains for whole life is that freedom demands a price- price of discipline, responsibility and continuous struggle. For most of them it is too high a price to pay for the freedom of thought or expression. But what they dread most is that freedom entails a lot of responsibility. Responsibility of fulfilling the promises made to self and others, responsibility of practicing what they preached to others & responsibility of proving that  freedom is a better choice on any given day. You need to ask two questions to begin your quest for freedom; first, do you want freedom?;secondly, are you ready to pay the price? If the answer to both the questions is yes, you are already a free man !   

Scare Yourself Daily

Though human being is fit to face any kind of challenge, he develops cold feet when confronted with a new one. We are comfortable doing the same things daily but very uncomfortable in a tough situation. It is because we wait for the challenge to come to us. We don't invite challenges. Inviting challenges is considered akin to inviting troubles. The fact is that the more challenges you meet, the readier you are for the next one. Do something daily that scares you & shocks other. This will benefit you two ways- one, you will learn new things much faster than others & secondly, and in consequence to the first fact, you will never be afraid of challenges in your life. In fact, you will enjoy every challenge that comes your way. 

If you find your life comforting & everything is hunky-dory, there is something to worry about. One big drawback of a predictable life is that you never learn to respond to a tough situation because you never expect one. You feel your life would remain same till end. If this be the case, your life has already ended because you have achieved what you wanted to achieve. Live it again by inviting challenges; they will give you a tough time but they will also teach you something that you would not learn otherwise. 

Illustrious writer, Stephen covey explained it in a lucid manner when he compared such person as sailing in the boat and enjoying his journey. He is going where the boat takes him. He doesn't  need to toil hard because he is going downstream. All of a sudden, when he sees the fall ahead he tries to change the direction by using his oars like hell, but in vain. He can't do anything now for two reasons; first, he doesn't have the strength & skills to change direction & secondly, it is too late. He has no option but to go down and accept his fate. 

Had he been trying to develop skills by inviting challenges during the comfortable journey, he would have prepared himself for this situation. Now he has no option but to regret & this is what most of us do in later part of life when faced with tough situations. Take control of your present & get ready to take on future challenges if you want to live a meaningful life. 

Time To Run

Keeping fit is a funny matter. People exchange their health for money when they are young & when they face illness, they want to exchange all their money for good health, but in vain. When asked  to take care of health, the usual reply is, " Who has time for exercise?" It is like driving a vehicle which is short of petrol & when asked to get it filled, the driver replying, " Come on ! who has time to get it filled?" But if you don't take care of it now, you will have to drag it to the filling station & who knows by that time it will lose the all the purpose of continuing the journey. Exercising is more a matter of discipline than that of need. And the interesting part is, the more you ignore it, the more you need it.