Using Pain And Pleasure

Our life is entirely dependent on the way we use pain & pleasure in our life. We fail because we overreact to our pleasures & pains. We falter in life when we let these emotions rule us. We cant wish them away but we can surely use them to our advantage. We should know the way to define pleasure & pain in our life. If you associate your failure to a lot of pain, you would never accept failure. Similarly, if you associate any good habit to extreme pleasure, you will adopt this habit as an integral part of your life. So, pain & pleasure are nothing but mediums to write the story of your life.   

Love Changes All

Love moves in circles & encompasses everything that is connected to the persons in love. This is the most precious gain from love. The existence which looks mundane to an ordinary eye, transforms into a magical world. And as the intensity of love increases, the circle in which it operates also expands. After a certain period, love becomes blind- blind to any deformity in the world or to any blemish in the person. Life turns into a beautiful song. But the opposite of this fact is equally true. Hate also changes everything around a person. A person who hates someone attracts everything which is negative, sees every act with suspicion & finds the life around him to be bitter & mean. In fact, in both the cases, the world remains the same. It is the medium that changes. The lesson to be learnt from this strange game of love & hate is that we make the world around us; not the other way round. 

Smile A While

It is difficult to decide what is easier to get- a frown or a smile. But the results are not difficult to gauge. While smile is a close cousin of success, frowning means only failure. The other notable difference is that smile is more of an internal activity on which one has complete control. On the other hand frowning is externally driven & thus controlled by something on which a person has no control. Smiling takes much less physical effort while frowning can be very taxing on body. In spite of these facts frowning comes naturally to some people & they make it their second nature. After some time, it starts telling on their faces & it gets more & more difficult for them to smile. And this is how they stop celebrating life & start passing years.     

Vocation as Vacation

People get frustrated with their jobs for one of the two opposite reasons- either they don't work at all or they work too much. And the reason for that is that we either don't love our job or we take it too seriously. On both accounts, we suffer. Either we fail too soon or we get burnt out. The best way to  be in any job is to do something that you love. Even if it means less money or more work, choose the same. The best way to work is to choose your hobby as your profession. By doing so you will convert your vocation into vacation.  

An Urgent Question

Many a time we don't get much from life because we ask the wrong questions, or worse still, we don't ask any question before starting an activity. Before doing anything, people have tendency to ask,"What's in it  for me?"& if the answer is,"Nothing", they shun that activity. The fact of the matter is that in any action, the more there is for others, the more you should try to perform it. Because, ultimately the same people, you are helping to achieve their goals, will help you achieve yours. So, the question to be asked is ," What's in it for others?" and if the answer is,"A lot", jump into the activity & give it your best shot. 

Time To Run

Keeping fit is a funny matter. People exchange their health for money when they are young & when they face illness, they want to exchange all their money for good health, but in vain. When asked  to take care of health, the usual reply is, " Who has time for exercise?" It is like driving a vehicle which is short of petrol & when asked to get it filled, the driver replying, " Come on ! who has time to get it filled?" But if you don't take care of it now, you will have to drag it to the filling station & who knows by that time it will lose the all the purpose of continuing the journey. Exercising is more a matter of discipline than that of need. And the interesting part is, the more you ignore it, the more you need it.

Don't Teach; Inspire

Human mind can work in many modes. The easiest one is telling mode & this is what majority of people do- they tell. They tell because they think they know. Asking is easy but it does not come naturally to people because asking means telling that you don''t know.  It takes guts to accept & tell that i don't know. And what to do if you know something.  Should you go & shout from the rooftops that you know? Try it; no one will listen because they won't trust you. They realize that if you have knowledge why do you need to  shout? Even if you whisper, people will come to listen to you if you are knowledgeable. Should you explain ? No need to explain because explaining means convincing them that two & two make four. You don't need to do that. Should you demonstrate? If there is a need, you should show how two & two make four every single time whatever method you employ. But the best way to teach something is by inspiring others. Because when you inspire, you become one with the person. You are the teacher & the learner both. The wall of ego melts into nothingness.  

Pray To Please

We displease many people every day on a non-issue. In fact we don't displease others; we displease ourselves. Man is not an island. We are connected to so many people every single moment that we can't escape getting unhurt if someone is hurt by our act. Our mood is not a separate entity.  It is dependent on the atmosphere around us which in turn is created by us. So, when we displease someone, we lay foundation for a bad mood for ourselves. Next time when you go to pray, forgive everyone who hurts you & pray for him. Also apologize for  every act of yours that might have offended someone. You will ensure a happy mood & a happy time ahead for yourself. 

Death of a caterpillar

 We guide our child to be the best among all- best among friends, best among relatives, best among neighbors. But we never guide him to be the best in what he likes. We want him to be the best in what we like. And this is the beginning of  slow death of a caterpillar. We treat a child more like a trophy than like a bundle of talents. We polish this trophy only from the side that faces others, neglecting the side facing the self. When he grows up he sees only a rough & disfigured image of self in that trophy & accepts himself as such. Caterpillars or butterflies are not responsible for their extinction. We are.  

Control The Self

We spend better part of our life controlling others, forgetting that we have someone so close to us who needs to be controlled. Control over outer world may give us false feeling that we are powerful but control over self gives the real inner strength. Another notable fact is that control over others is dependent on external factors, therefore is transient.Control over self is permanent as it is not dependent on any external source.Another interesting fact is that once you control  the self, other controls will appear so hollow that you would not like to exercise these.  

Trying In Trying Circumstances

Most of the feats are achieved under trying circumstances. If the same people were in convenient conditions, they might have not got the same results. It is because of the pressure of those adverse circumstances that made them achieve what they did. It was because they burnt all their bridges & destroyed all their ships, that they were left with no other choice but to be victorious. They destroyed everything that came in the way between them and their goal. They never looked for help; they only hunted for opportunities & they got these in plenty. Once they got opportunities, they needed no resource because they knew they were the best resource available in those conditions.

Party Hard

Bad part of the gift called life is that you get it only once but the good part is that if you use it right, one gift is more than enough & you enjoy every bit of it. The tragedy is not that the gift doesn't last long, the tragedy is that while it lasts we tend to ignore it. We only unwrap the gift when we are about to start a new journey to a new & unknown land & cant carry it with us. By the time we realize how beautiful a gift life was, it is already late. So, we suffer not only during the party but also after the party. The mantra is to give yourself this gift quite early & party hard till you depart.    

Imagination Run Wild

The best part about imagination is that it doesn't have any limits or rules. It runs wild and fetches some of the weirdest ideas. It doesn't conform to any system nor does it allow any restriction.Once it gains momentum, it gathers highest speed in no time. It ventures into territories unheard-of by ordinary mind & performs some unthinkable tasks. If this be the case, why does an ordinary man shy away from it? Simply because he thinks it to be impractical. Doubts are created in his mind and he prefers living a routine life and departs as an ordinary soul. If only he understood the magic of imagination !       

Ignorant Genius

The most knowledgeable person is not the one who presumes that he has learnt a lot, but the one who knows that a lot is to be learnt. Knowledge is more dangerous than ignorance if knowledge stops any further growth of itself. Ignorance is good because it tells you that you don't know & also that you can know if you make a little effort. Another problem people confront is that they presume gaining knowledge is good only up to a certain age. This thought comes from a myth that knowledge is good only if it is used to gain something. Since we stop nursing any ambition of earning name, fame or money after a certain age, we stop learning as well. The truth is that knowledge should be gained only to contribute and that can be done at any age. 

From End To Beginning

Endings are not to be mourned; they should be welcomed. Though they indicate the end of something old & worn out, they also signal something new. No doubt, some endings are painful and traumatic.  It is not because of the ending but because of our attachment to the thing or person that ends. So, the only way we can lead a balanced life is to detach ourselves from everything that is transient & attaching ourselves to all that is eternal. Instead of attaching to the person, attach yourself to the never-ending learning or love of that soul. The person may end but you may forge a new relationship with his ideas & philosophy even after his departure.

Making Things Easier

Nothing is difficult or easy. We are either familiar to it or not. Walking is the easiest activity. it comes naturally to everyone. But it is not so easy to a child who is learning to walk. To him, crawling is a cakewalk. But walking needs efforts & practice. Once the child learns that, he enjoys every bit of it. But then, it becomes a routine & he moves to another activity. And the learning continues till he masters all basic activities viz. talking, walking, running etc. He learns these quite fast because he never thinks these to be difficult. He only thinks in terms of familiarity or unfamiliarity. But when he grows up, he changes his thought pattern & starts thinking in terms of possible or impossible; difficult or easy- and his growth is stunted. If only he knew that all things become easy once you master these. And the way to master anything is to begin & continue trying till you learn it. There is no other way to make difficult things easier. 

Scare Yourself

 Though human being is fit to face any kind of challenge, he develops cold feet when confronted with a new one. We are comfortable doing the same things daily but very uncomfortable in a tough situation. It is because we wait for the challenge to come to us. We don't invite challenges. Inviting challenges is considered akin to inviting troubles. The fact is that the more challenges you meet, readier you are for the next one. Do something daily that scares you & shocks other. This will benefit you two ways- one, you will learn new things much faster than others & secondly, and in consequence to the first fact, you will never be afraid of challenges in your life. In fact, you will enjoy every challenge that comes your way. 

Pure Consciousness

Human consciousness exists beyond time. Time & circumstances cease to exist when we have pure conscious thoughts. They are pure because they are not affected by any external force. When these thoughts are influenced by anything other than self, they are polluted. And when we carry these polluted thoughts, about self or others, we are polluted too. Though a person with polluted thinking pollutes others as well, he pollutes self the most. And that is not affected by years ; it is affected by quality & quantity of thoughts. This pure consciousness is called wisdom.  

Be Curious

A child is the most curious creature. But by the time he grows up to be a man, his curiosity is suppressed. It happens for two reasons- first, because he doesn't get the right answers and, secondly, because he is not encouraged to ask questions. We  forget that all the answers in the world were obtained by asking questions. The fact of the matter is that we are not afraid of questions. We are afraid of answers or lack of these. We are afraid of reality as it may sound shocking, at times. But that doesn't change the reality a bit. It remains the same-  shocking.
So, by not answering we are not changing the reality, we are only changing the state of mind of a child, for the worse. And this is too high a price to pay for our so called balanced approach. Curiosity did not kill the cat- lack of answers did it !

Dancing in the rain

There are two ways to look at a situation -good way or a better way. Good way is to learn from it and the better way is to enjoy the circumstance while learning. No adverse situation enters your life to trouble you. It only comes to test you, to teach you & to prepare you for the future. But our first reaction to any negative situation is the one that of rejection. And if the situation does not leave, we fly. The question to be asked is a selfish one - " What is in it for me?". The situation has come to teach you a lesson & your job is to learn from it. Period. The storm in your life will also bring some rain. Get drenched in the rain & dance. Soon there will be bright sunshine & a rainbow to  follow.   

Celebrate Failures

The funny thing about failure is that it doesn't exist- we only experience it. In fact, there is no such thing as failure in physical domain. It is only the thought of failure that flashes before us when we are not able to perform a particular task. And we make it so big that we are overwhelmed by it. So much so that we don't notice that even though we failed, we climbed another level. So, if you are at level 9 before so called failure, you don't go down to level 8 or you don't remain at level 9. You climb to level next- 10, 11...... Another thing about failure is that you are a wiser man after each failure because you gained experience of not doing an activity in a particular way. So, the next time you fail- celebrate, for climbing to next level & for all the experience & wisdom you gained during the process.

Experience Vs Wisdom

Aging is a natural process. But gaining wisdom while you age, is not natural. Most of the time we confuse wisdom with experience. We gain experience while we age, but not necessarily we become wise & the reason for this gap is that we don't learn from every experience. The degree of experience may also differ. Someone who has been in different situations or has met with many failures, will have more experience in comparison to someone who has led a risk-free life & avoided failures. This is the reason that we find a huge learning gap between people of almost same age. So, the key is to gain a lot of experience by leading an adventurous life & learn from every experience.  

Don't Be Startled

The joy of life doubles if we live life at an easy pace. On the contrary, the equilibrium is disturbed when we try to exert or force our timing on it. Universe loves tranquility, peace, silence. If you deal with it with these virtues, it will give you the same. On the other hand, if you deal with it with noise, disturbance or force, you will get back the same. If something is amiss in your life, there must be a reason. Don't try to find the reason. It will show up at the right moment & then, you will appear to be a very small part in the scheme of things designed by Universe for you. Don't be startled then as it was designed this way only. Just accept & enjoy !

Worry not !

Worry has never solved problems of future, nor has it been useful in resolving issues of the past. Worry can only help to aggravate the issue, give you some heartaches or take away some years of your productive life. And the reason for that is that it never induces response, it only induces reactions. And issues can never be resolved through reactions. Worry also leads to self-pity or feeling of helplessness. But, the most detrimental result of excessive worrying is that it steals the joy of today from your life without removing the sorrow of tomorrow. Still, worry is the favorite pastime of quite many. It is because they erroneously believe that it will lead to some solution. While all that worrying does is that it becomes another problem. 

Action Vs Ability

There is no living particle or being that is devoid of its ability to act. If someone is not taking action, it is not because of his inability but because of his choice. Like action, inaction is also a choice. But there is a huge difference  between the two choices. While former defines life, the later represents death. And this is precisely why action is said to be a bigger attribute than ability. Generally speaking, people don't lack ability; they lack only action. But the brighter part of this fact is that ability takes some time to grow, action is taken in no time. While ability is a matter of days, action is a matter of moments. So, act now; this moment. 

Mind Your Business

You are the only one of your type in this world. It is impossible to get another one like you even if you are a rare piece. So, accept yourself fully instead of being a second rate copy of someone else. If an average man develops only one of his many traits and distinguishes himself in a particular field, he can reach the pinnacle of success. The world will be enriched with a huge store of rare & original talents. The trouble is that we try to be what people think of us. In doing so, we make of ourselves only an average copy of someone else & the original copy gets lost in the jungle of average people.  What people think of us & want us to become is not our business. It is theirs & they should be left to take care of the same. You mind your own business viz. die an original. 

What An Idea

When you start something new, not many people support your cause. They may even oppose you or scoff at the idea. Don't stop. Actually, these people should give you the will to continue. If you look at history, you will find that most of the successful ideas were opposed vehemently by the people who supported the same idea later on. Either they stood for the idea or they vanished ! It was not because of the idea. It was because of the person behind the idea. He continued despite the opposition. On the contrary, you will find many ideas dying a premature death because it was not accepted by the critics. But the same idea in some other form became a hit despite the opposition from same or larger number of critics. This proves that idea, per se, does not decide its acceptance or rejection, but the ownership of the idea by its inventor determines whether it will be a hit or end up in smoke. 

Make a choice

When we think about our life, we either rue the chances we didn't get or that we didn't make most of the chances we got. And when we say chance, we mean chance to earn a lot of money, to be hugely  successful or to earn a lot of fame. We hardly say we didn't get a chance to be happy or feel happy, or we didn't get someone to love. Because even a naive knows that every one gets these chances. So, why do we ignore these blessings & choose a life which may be full of luxury or fame but is devoid of compassion, happiness or love? You can have these wonderful gifts in your life & still have abundance. So, why not make the most of life by having all? Your choice is not between happiness and abundance. The choice is between happiness & greed.

Enjoy The Journey

We live in a world which is running out of time. Everybody is in a hurry. Actually we run out of patience before we run of time. We don't have the time to pause & admire the glory of this beautiful world. We think  that the happiness lies in reaching the top at the earliest. We fail to realize the real joy is in enjoying the beauty on our way up. If we move towards our target slowly yet surely, it becomes so small that we wonder why didn't we achieved it earlier.  The fact of the matter is had you got hard on it, it would have become harder to get. Persistence is more powerful a gift than speed. When you persist, you learn on the way but when you make a dash towards your goal, you only see your goal & learning takes a back seat. So, enjoy the walk instead of huffing & puffing after the race. Anyway, life is not a race to be won but a journey to be enjoyed.  

Start Now

Finishing a journey is not difficult. The real problem lies in starting it. Many of the projects, business ventures or relationships die even before they see the light of the day. When we begin something new, we look more at the impossibilities than at possibilities. We start thinking in terms of, "what if...." instead of  " wow it can be done". This happens because either we don't look at the final object or if we do, we get scared at the thought of enormity of the effort that would be needed to get past the line. The best way to start anything big is to start 'now'- means when you get a green signal from your subconscious mind; when you make the first clear picture of the project in your mind. Don't ponder; don't ask questions. All questions will be answered by the Universe at the right time. Just start- start now ! 

The Right Angle

Situations are not good or bad; your angle of looking at things is proper or improper. your perspective about situations or which side you are on, decides the state of your mind. People lose huge amount in share market & blame the market for the loss. But in the same falling market some people make a fortune. Market is only bearish or bullish. It can not be labelled as good market or bad market. It is your decision in that market that makes it good or bad. And the decision originates from your angle of vision. Same logic applies to our circumstances. They are not good or bad. How we see them & how we react to them, decides whether they are good or bad. The other benefit of holding your perspective responsible for the quality of your circumstances is that it is in your control; circumstances are not.